I work in an office of women and it’s quite discouraging. Through the course of a single day, the topics of conversation include: Reality T.V, how much they hate their bodies, celebrities, plastic surgery, cosmetics, and how annoying their kids/boyfriends/husbands are. I have never had much in common with women, especially the “modern” woman. Perhaps my lack of appreciation for the modern women stems from my facing constant rejection by many of them due to the way I live my life. I am openly submissive. I love my husband and he rarely annoys me. I enjoy meeting his needs, and I love to take care of him in any way necessary. I don’t like to be an inconvenience to him and I refuse to be a nag. Thus, I have a relationship that is relatively free from any resentments or drama, save the occasional squabble over something stupid like him not picking something out for dinner off his bi-weekly menu I make him. We have a relationship that, I would deem, comes as close to perfection as possible. My relationship and my lifestyle, it would appear, would be the cause of my lack of steady female companionship. I am rarely unhappy with any part of my personal life or myself, so I appear haughty I’m female circles. The perception of haughtiness is threatening and the antithesis to female bonding over bitching.
I also don’t hate my body. I appreciate my body. I am happy with the way it looks and feel very comfortable naked. If I come into a pattern of low self-esteem over something about my body, I’ll make an expeditated move to fix it in whatever manner possible. If I feel like I’m hanging onto a few extra pounds, I amp up my workouts and cut back on some of the foods that could be holding me back from my goal. I have nothing against plastic surgery, and may find myself in need of some in the future. But, I don’t see a need to discuss it at length with other women. How does airing discomfort provide comfort? Can women only dish a complement without the need for one in return if they perceive themselves as equal or better than the person they are paying the compliment to?
How does this fix anything? How does this make these women feel better? Perhaps, female comradery is built upon a foundation of self-hate and negativity. Do women have to demean themselves to find acceptance from other women and feel as though they fit in? Why are the lives of celebrities (or their assumed lives based upon what the media portrays) fascinating enough to cover the span of an hour or more in near constant communication? Who the fuck cares? Any significant amount of time spent discussing celebrities is an utter waste of time. If each moment brings us closer to our death, I don’t want to spend it discussing the Kardashians for an hour.
My life experience thus far has revealed that to share a relationship of any depth with another woman you must be at least mildly miserable with yourself and your life. You must enjoy complaining. Complaining seems to be the very thread essential to the fiber of the female friendship. People within earshot of such pointless, meaningless and seemingly endless jabber should be the newest victims to form a hashtag movement. Are you having to listen to women bonding over bitching and it’s making you miserable? #metoo.