Category Archives: Monogamy

Seed and Swallow

swal·low1
ˈswälō
verb
 1.
  1. cause or allow (something, especially ejaculate) to pass down the throat.
    “she swallowed a mouthful slowly”
    noun
  1. 1.
    an act of swallowing something, especially ejaculate.
    “she downed his ejaculate in one swallow”

    ShowLove

    I took a long and lazy break away from writing that I am not proud of.  However, it is the nature of me to wax and wane on things that require my attention outside of my King.  A particular topic has ignited my passion to write this post, even though the clutches of laziness for writing had a grip on me with great strength.

    What topic could inspire me from such depths, you ask?

    The topic of SWALLOWING.

    I have recently come to a shocking social discovery amongst my peers.  Many of the females I know, either rather well or just by brief acquaintance, do not swallow their man’s cum.  But, this isn’t just a matter of not swallowing, no.  These women express that they don’t like his cum and find it “disgusting”. Now, this discovery bothers me on so many levels and I feel the need to address each one; not only because it does my psyche well to express things that frustrate me, but because maybe this will resonate with the very few people who will actually read this post.

    My King is a fantastic pussy eater.  He is passionate, aggressive, and will quite literally devour me.  He is very complementary of my taste, and hearing the rumblings of, “You taste so fucking good” escape his muffled (get it?) mouth generates a fire within me that ignites my femininity from the most dormant recesses of my body.  He never hesitates, never waits, and never progresses toward my pussy with caution.  I never go long without being exceptionally eaten.  My King insists upon making me cum, using his muscular strength to lock down my hips as they buck energetically in anticipation of my orgasm.  When I do cum, I flood.  He will proceed to press harder into my flesh, lapping more and more with each twitch of my body.  As his moans grow deeper, he usually thrusts a finger or two inside of me, only to lick them clean after pulling them from my body.  I feel like a goddess.  I feel beautiful, desired, owned, and utterly appreciated for being a woman.  His woman.

    I cannot imagine if, upon the first signs of my impending orgasm, my King pulled away from my pussy and proceeded to rub my clit to finish the deed.  I cannot fathom how I would feel if his mouth stayed on my cunt long enough to finish my orgasm, only to spit out whatever saliva he had in his mouth that still tasted of me.  I would be devastated if my husband asked that I cum on his chest, and after my orgasm, he took a towel and wiped me off him while making a face akin to a face one would make while wiping off a bird shit from their t-shirt.

    Yet, this appears to be commonplace behind closed doors.  I can’t understand, for the life of me, why a man would accept any of these behaviors from a woman, especially a woman you are committed to monogamously.  Why are men so tolerant of a woman viewing their seed in such a way, when a woman would never be as tolerant?  Is this another reflection of our cultures growing inequality and demasculinization of men in the name of “feminism”?  Are men starting to feel like that’s “just the way it is” and cum swallowing women are saved for viewing porn?  And what about in a marriage, where you have promised to spend the rest of your lives together in a monogamous relationship, and you have a lifetime of feeling the cold air hit your cock just prior to orgasm.  If your wife is reluctant, or downright refuses to swallow your cum, what other doors will be shut in the realm of your sexual experiences together?  How does this not frighten these men straight into the arms of a receptive woman?  Perhaps this is sometimes the reason for affairs, and if so, I don’t blame the men for wanting to put their cocks in a welcoming mouth.

    Yet, it would still be the man’s fault.  He would still be labeled a “dog” and scorned by the vast majority of those around him.  He would still go to sleep feeling the tinge of guilt on his conscious for acting on desires that went unmet…

    For wanting to be WANTED.

    I’m not saying a woman needs to love cum.  I’m not saying that she must get on her knees before her man, mouth agape, batting her eyelashes, parched and desperate for his cum.  I’m not saying a woman needs to scoop her man’s cum into her hands and devour it like a toddler does with a slice of birthday cake.  I am suggesting that a woman should swallow a man’s cum when he wants to leave his cock in her mouth to orgasm.  I am suggesting a woman should show appreciation for her man’s cum as if it’s her pleasure to please him.  I am suggesting that when sharing your bodies, there should be very few things you find distasteful about one another and cum should NOT be one of them.

    I would argue that the taste of orgasm should be seen as a reward.  Brining your loved one to orgasm should be something of an accomplishment to be cherished and valued.  Most common arguments from women for not swallowing cum can easily be resolved:  If you don’t particularly like the taste of his cum, use flavored organic lube.  If you don’t like the feeling of his cum hitting you in the back of the throat, deep throat him.  If you can’t deep throat because it makes you gag, use a product that numbs the back of your throat temporarily.  Or better yet, practice deep throating.  You can significantly improve your gag reflux by practicing, and I’m fairly confident your man would be a willing participant as you practice.  Bottom line, there is no excuse for not swallowing.  It is inexcusable to treat the product of your man’s orgasm as intolerable.  Step outside of yourself and imagine how that rejection would feel.

    And if, as a man, you feel guilty when holding the opinion that a woman should swallow…Don’t.  Women don’t struggle gulping down ridiculous drinks to lose 10 lbs; swallow smelly, bad tasting herbs to improve their hair and skin.  Women will eat certain foods that are disgusting to improve their beauty and health without hesitation.  If she’s unwilling to swallow your cum, you should find it insulting.  She is basically saying that your pleasure isn’t worth her discomfort, and by accepting that, you are saying that her opinion is okay.  You are rewarding her pettiness, and that is unacceptable.

    I find it tragic that so many women will treat their men in a way that would make them feel rejected.  A man who tolerates this behavior perpetuates this double standard.  Just because we have been cultured to feel that a man’s emotions and need to feel appreciated is an afterthought doesn’t make it true.  Just because we often place men into roles with a purpose meanwhile quickly dismissing their need to feel like a man, doesn’t mean they aren’t longing to feel like a man.  Just because you may not WANT to doesn’t ultimately make it unnecessary.

    If it’s true that actions speak louder than words…

    SWALLOW.


Not you, boy…

I could not be tamed. I loped with wild horses and dined with lionesses. I made beautiful work of faux feminism, teeth into the flesh of lesser men. Dinner for a hungry soul in search of the sustenance of a Dominant man. Flip of the hair, curve of my hips; all the while knowing they couldn’t handle this.

They would seep weakness, and I couldn’t be bothered to clean up messes, not for long, not for very long. They tried, they cried, and I thought of nothing but You. 

They said, “I thought I could change you” while smelling Your cologne on my breast. They said, “I can love you better”, while Your love was slipping out of me.

I was told to feel bad about my sins, taught to atone; but, my religion is Him and my God had anointed me. I’d been baptized in His water. I’ve knelt at His feet to receive my confirmation. 

Oh, and they’d seethe because they knew I only worshipped One. I’d only kneel for One. Only submit to One. Only to be tamed by One. You’d have me a tigress on a leash, never having to pull tight. Never having to tug me in, and never having to cry “heal!”  But, they tried; a boisterous laugh escaped my mouth with each attempt to rein. You? Better off someone new; go find someone new, boy…

I cannot settle for a cub whilst craving a lion. I cannot mount a pony when I’ve been atop a stallion. Go ahead and wear any mask you choose, any cloak you deem comfortable; all of your disguises transparent, boy. You have proved entertaining, a jester for a time…

Only one Lord, you see, and He is mine. 


Fair Play

Warning:  This post is likely to offend you.

I have been absent for a while dealing with the holidays and other work related business.  As I can finally take a breath, I find myself moved to write.  I felt like a zombie there for a while, simply going through the motions and obligations that the holidays bestow upon us.  My creativity was stifled under all the responsibility, but I had time to think about things that I wanted to write about.

I attended a bridal shower yesterday for a close friend of mine.  On her invitation it read, “…is registered at Lowe’s, Home Depot and Target.”  I stared down at the invitation in my hands and thought to myself, “Dear God…How long can you expect a marriage to last if your bridal shower invitation resembles that of a housewarming party?”  I refused to get her a gift of anything she requested, and instead got her a giftcard to a local sex shop complemented by a card that read, “The key to a lasting and happy marriage is an open and mutually thrilling sex life, not a new toaster or 5 horsepower blender.”

I am not a believer in marriage; at least, I should say that I am not a believer in marriage in the traditional sense.  I don’t believe that marriage is the answer for lifelong happiness, family security, and a guarantee for monogamy.  I believe that marriage makes little sense, as it essentially forces individuals into patterns of predictability for the survival of family; meanwhile, society perpetuates a notion of lasting passion and fulfillment.  Passion and fulfillment can certainly be achieved while married, but usually that involves a high level of disclosure and intimacy.  Further, I am not a believer in marriage as our present society would see fit.  I believe that now, more than ever, men are emasculated within the bounds of marriage.  We have begun at young ages to emasculate our boys into behavior akin to females.  We are expecting of men to act as women, boys to act as girls:  Sit still, behave, be polite, don’t dominate, don’t show signs of aggression, and do not be overtly sexual.

We women are highly sexual creatures as well, despite what our society would have you believe.  The most dishonest of behaviors I have seen were displayed from women.  Women can easily secure a reliable man, whilst trolling for a thrilling and short lived tryst between the sheets.  He would be none the wiser, as men often assume that women are happy as long as they are provided for.  Another nod for society on that misconception.  Men typically do not feign well, as they are not as accustomed to operating from a place of dual existence: The “me” I will show the world, and the “me” that I relish within my mind.

You may not like reading this, but I don’t believe that people who cheat are necessarily guilty of anything aside from searching, and in some cases, attaining personal happiness.  The quest for personal happiness is our “right” as we are told; however, we are also told the quest should look a certain way.  Now would be an excellent time to stress honesty, but alas, I will not.  I can completely understand an inherent need for secrecy with the amount of responsibility and stress we have placed upon marriage, monogamy and the necessity to deny our inner desires.  Those who often cry “liar” toward the cheater were the ones most likely to cast judgment upon that person’s sexual desires; or withhold sexual gratification for personal motives; close doors for intimacy and communication that should remain open; and abuse their lover for the same qualities they initially found appealing.  Shame…

My opinion, as it applies to most cases of infidelity that I have experienced or been informed of, stem from a place of rejection.  In my experience, the people most guilty of these slights are the “fairer sex”.  Women are conditioned to believe that sexuality should be used as a means for gain and attainment.  Women are usually guilty of using sex for securing a man, reproduction, financial security, or material possessions.  If she happens to secure the responsible man AND a child – Jackpot!  She has significantly upped her chances of being taken care of for the majority of her life, with minimal effort on her part.  I firmly believe that once those essentials are provided for such women, they proceed to quickly pull the plug on devoting excessive energy to sexual fulfillment and emotional intimacy with their spouse.  Women who express their sexuality freely, for a personal fulfillment void of motive, are often labeled unkindly.  Why?  Because our society is threatened by sexual liberation.  Instead of embracing the fact that we are extremely sexual creatures and monogamy is highly unlikely under “normal” conditions; we buy into the farce that civilization has created for control: Religion.  But, that we will safe for another post…

If monogamy is something you choose to strive for – you had better up the ante.  My husband and I strive for monogamy, and my husband is deliciously territorial.  I permit my husband to express his territorial behavior from the recesses of his mind, because I find it primal and utterly delightful.  Blended within the fibers of our commitment to monogamy is the belief that our marriage didn’t guarantee a thing, aside from joint property ownership.  We understand that in order to beat the odds against our inner nature, we must consistently work toward sexual fulfillment and enlightenment.  We understand that communication is essential, expressing our deepest inner desires and working toward making them a reality.  This can be difficult, as you must be willing to listen despite your own personal “notions” of how things should be.  Certainly, you do not have to agree to fulfill your partner’s every whim; however, I also believe that you cannot expect to have monogamy from that person if their desire is strong.  I don’t believe this should be troubling, instead, I think it should be viewed as freeing.  Do your best and the rest will fall into place as it will.  As I’ve argued before, the more we repress the animal, the more the animal will rise within us.  To convince yourself of anything different is to ignore your evolutionary past.

I feel cheating was justified in the vast majority of situations.  Sure someone gets hurt and it can have lasting effects upon families and such.  As a collective society, we have built unrealistic expectations upon the human, and thus, marriage.  These expectations have long acted as a catalyst for crying victim and mental instability by the person being cheated on.  Aligning your expectations with these societal presumptions is setting yourself up for failure, and will neglect to serve you well, aside from an excuse for your own negligence.  You cannot expect monogamy; instead, you must cherish it within your relationship and work toward maintaining it.  That’s simply the best you can do.

I am so sick of hearing people speak of monogamy as if a guaranteed “right” in their relationships.  You can hope for it, encourage it, and cultivate the best environment possible to maintain it; however, if you don’t continuously strive to maintain it, you should not be surprised if the practice of “monogamy” fails you.  Believing monogamy is in our human nature was your first mistake; believing you are entitled to it simply because you are married or in a committed relationship is your second mistake.

If a person declines to acknowledge their own personal responsibility to cultivating an environment encouraging of monogamy, then I believe they deserve to be cheated on.  I believe that entitlement encourages laziness; the same expression can be applied toward marriage.  A person who believes that marriage guarantees them monogamy is a dangerous partner in life.  It is highly likely that their entitlement will lead to a laziness that will not only stifle your sexuality, but devour your spirit and crush your individuality.  Too often, we expect promises to last a lifetime even as we fail to maintain the environment for which those original promises were made.  I believe cheating is a right in any relationship where a person feels entitled to your loyalty without maintaining their end of the agreement.  Do I feel that you should leave the relationship entirely?  Sure, that is probably a good idea.  However, as a society we have complicated relationships (especially marriages) to aid in trapping people in lifelong commitments.  We have worked for centuries to cultivate these domestic messes and are often victims of our own misplaced assumptions and financial entanglements imposed upon our marriages.  That is our fault and failure as a society.  Blaming a person who cheated and failing to acknowledge how you may have encouraged the “discretion” is your fault.  If you are unreasonable enough to believe in monogamy as a guarantee at all costs, then you deserve to be cheated on for your laziness and unrealistic expectations.

Alas, as I watched roughly 20 women “oooh and ahhhh” at blenders, pots and pans, and a Keurig 2.0, I quietly hoped that my friend would soon realize that her perception of “happily ever after” is already skewed.  I hope that she will encourage open communication between she and her spouse, release her expectations, and begin to appreciate him on a “human” level.  I know she won’t, and I can’t help but surmise that I will hold her hand in the not too distant future as she cries on my shoulder repeating, “He promised me forever…”  I’ll remember how much importance was placed upon the house and not the man.  I’ll remember how her expectations aligned so naively with societal expectations.  I’ll remember how I wrote her a card that said, “I refuse to gift you a household appliance for your bridal shower, and instead, encourage you to tend to your sexual relationship.”

And I’ll know without her ever needing to say that instead of giving her husband unlimited and unrestricted access to her “cake”, she decided to bake one instead.


Monogamy or Monotony?

MorM

photo courtesy of: http://www.fungagz.com

People say, “The key to a happy marriage is God”.  I laugh.  They cannot possibly be serious?  I believe the key to a happy marriage is mutual need gratification.  I side with the school of “need” rather than the school of “religion”.  There is a common law under this school, a rule in which all students operate under; this rule is: “Thou shall meet the needs of thy partner and thou shall have thy needs met in addition, orst thou shall find it elsewhere.”

Sounds harsh?  The truth usually is.  Now, we can state that the key to a strong marriage lies in a common faith in God.  However, I believe that a common faith in God merely solidifies the union through the imposed rules by Biblical tradition.  For instance, do you not covet your neighbor’s wife (or husband) because you don’t THINK about it and don’t WANT to…or do you not covet your neighbor’s wife because you believe you will have to beg for your forgiveness and could possibly burn in a fiery pit of liquid hot magma for eternity?  Moreover, do you kick those thoughts right out of your head because it’s a sin to think of someone else sexually when in a matrimonial union or because you don’t want to have the thoughts and find them unpleasant?  I will side more with the former.  I feel that if you have to turn to God to make your marriage persist, then you are on shaky ground.  God can only help you so much; the rest is up to the two people in the union.  The rest is also challenged by biology.  If you subscribe to that whole, “God made us in his image” belief, well, he made us biologically charged with instinctual needs too.

It is my belief that biological and instinctual needs drive the species.  We may justify our deviation from these needs under the guise of religion, but the need still exists.  We may project that we are beyond it, but the needs lie suppressed.  Religion has a strangle hold on everything that is biologically programmed in our species…Why?  Because biology and instinct is something that we can’t control, something that we can’t ignore.  It’s the pink elephant in the room that we turn the other cheek to…Just because we are not looking at it, does not mean it ceases to exist.  With this being said, if you or your partners needs are not being met (no matter a marital or committed relationship), that person is nearly guaranteed to look outside for satisfaction of those needs.  It’s only natural.  This theory is increased by level of attractiveness also.  If you are with someone or you are an attractive person, you have more options…you are used to having more options; therefore, more attention must be paid in order to satisfy those needs.  Can these needs be suppressed?  Of course.  But does suppressing something make it not exist, or does it direct its attention elsewhere in the form of an outlet?  It may not necessarily be another person.  Perhaps it becomes something electronic, or something battery operated…But, the problem still remains and is clearly not being taken care of.

Maybe I’m just someone who likes to get to the root of a problem.  But why do I see so many people satisfied with the illusion rather than reality.  It seems as though some people are satisfied with “looking” like they have the perfect life rather than attempting to create that life.  Yes, we can never achieve perfection; but I feel it’s a goal that although never achieved, is still something that we should strive for.  The image of the perfect relationship does not a perfect relationship make…so why are some satisfied with that?  I’ve seen people succumb to deceit when they know exactly what is going on behind their backs – How does this help anything?  If you value the other person in your life and you value them on the basis of being a human being; Not just a husband, not a boyfriend, not just a wife, nor a girlfriend, not just a father, not just a mother…but a human being in which you value:  Just satisfy their needs!  Furthermore, if you are the less sexually charged in your relationship you must be the one to step up to the plate.  Relationships are meant to be coveted, and the bar is set at the most highly sexualized person…and if you are not coveting your relationship and you are with a quality individual, someone else will gladly reciprocate their appreciation.

So let’s settle with the truth:  If you have been cheated on, you have cheated, or you have thought about it, contemplated it, or fantasized about it…then you probably can agree with me.  God merely acts like a large block wall that we masons put up desperately so that we may not have to face the truth.  Is it the devil putting those thoughts into your head, or is it biology?  We must blame it on someone evil because we can’t control it…and we’re ashamed of our natural tendencies.  We blame the other person for their lack of self control, when the blame also lies within the one pointing the finger.  Embrace yourself, your sexuality, and it will embrace you back.  Was it just “not meant to be” and you diverted off of the path God intended, or could it have benefited your relationship to have kept yourself up and spent a little more time in the bedroom?  We can blame God for a lot of things, we can blame others for an even more extensive amount of circumstance – but we simply can’t blame ourselves for say…a lack of oral copulation?

It would be a safe argument to say that the human species, by nature is not a monogamous creature.  Woman want the most qualified man; that of physical strength, stamina, and protection.  Men want the most biologically gifted physically to enhance their genetic components for their offspring.  Evolution, society, religion and its mores just get in the way of what we are natural inclined to do.  With that being said, when we make the choice to be committed and make the choice to be monogamous we can certainly make that choice a little easier by not expecting the other person to be less than a basic human with basic needs.  If we meet those needs, we are certainly in for more of a healthy and fulfilling relationship.  It’s time we took a little more responsibility for our own actions instead of using God as an scapegoat for reality.  You cannot deny biology, you also cannot deny the concept of “nurture” and its role in your life…identifying and meeting the needs of all of these components may not be easy, but it is something we should embrace to the fullest.  If you don’t, you have no one to blame but yourself.