I’m feeling particularly feisty today…a delightful post I wrote a while ago before this blog existed.
I love a man with manners, but respect is more important in the bedroom. The female obsession with Fifty Shades of Grey is basically the cry out for the good fuck that women don’t know how to ask for. It’s quite simple really. Women are sick of taking care of you. They are sick of having to take the lead in your everyday life. They are always in control. They want you to show them that you still know how to make their thighs tremble. You are not a dependent little boy. She wants to know that you can take her as passionately as she imagines the man next door could.
Does this scene sound familiar: You are tired from a hard day of work. You struggle to get dinner on the table within a reasonable time before you need to go to bed. You are already preparing yourself for tomorrow’s work day. You are exhausted, but there is a reasonable part of you that recognizes that you haven’t had sex with your partner in a while. You proceed to get ready for bed and climb under the covers…clothed. You turn on the television and settle in, your arm pressed snugly against the side of your partner’s body. You don’t say much, but you begin to kiss or touch each other in a somewhat suggestive manner. You can pretty much predict the routine that will follow. He will follow the same “pleasure trail” as usual. Right breast…Left breast…a little fondling…he’ll trace a line down your stomach in simple, meek kisses. He’ll pay some oral attention to you, assuming it’s pleasurable. He’ll assume his spectacular oral skills are making you wet, when in reality, it’s just his saliva. You don’t make much effort toward him, because you have a headache. You then have approximately 3 to 5 minutes of sex resembling the pace of a metronome. If you’re lucky, you’ll cum. But, you’re not really concerned with this anyway…because…well, you have a headache. Plus, you know he’ll keep going in his sad attempt to satisfy you if you don’t lie about it.
You’re a timid bunch, gentleman. The world has emasculated you. Sure, you may not be 18 anymore; but, you still have the glorious effects of that surging testosterone. Most women agree that a man who is unapologetic in their attraction to them is a complete turn on. Stop being coy and delivering the same punches you’ve always thrown. It’s time for a new bag of tricks. It’s time for you to reclaim yourself as an alpha male. It’s time you took control in a much bigger way. I’m going to switch rolls a bit here. I will have the cock. I will successfully lay the pipe. And it goes a little something like this:
I walk in from a hard day of work. Throughout the day, I’ve envisioned all the many ways I was going to make you surrender to me. I pictured myself with a handful of your blond hair, shoving myself deep into your mouth. You’d be staring up at me, and this would give me a sense of elevation. You are always telling me what to do. I am always asking for your permission. I imagine you, face down, and leaned over the kitchen counter with your legs spread. I am deep inside you, and with every thrust, you are pushed against the cool countertop making your nipples hard.
I watch you make dinner. I admire your curves. I envision the positions I’m going to put you in when we go upstairs…when everyone is asleep. We finish with the mundane tasks of our evening and head upstairs. You’re at the sink beginning to wash your face. I come up behind you. I take my hand and run it up the back of your head, grabbing a significant handful of hair. I pull the hair downward, exposing your neck. You’d expect me to go there next, but I don’t. I proceed to spread your legs apart and penetrate you with my fingers. I keep the grip on your hair, tugging a little with every thrust of my fingers. I push you face down onto the counter, with my fingers still inside you; I pull your ass up to meet my face. I tongue you from behind. Not too much. Just enough. I turn you around and hold your face within my hands at my waist level. I bend down to grab your breasts. I am just delicate enough to not bruise you. I’d part your lips with my thumb, opening your mouth and rub the head of my cock on your lips. You suck me in. You wouldn’t be shy about it because I wouldn’t let you. I sense you’re beginning to enjoy yourself, so I stand you back up. I aggressively grab your hips and bend you in half. I thrust into you. I don’t proceed gently. I take a free hand and grasp your shoulder to enable me to penetrate you deeper. I finger your clit while I’m inside of you. My strokes are long and deep. I hold my cock inside of you and feel you clench around me. I fuck you ridiculously, furiously and barbarically. I pull out. I have to taste you. I have to taste “us”. I lift you onto the countertop and spread your legs in front of me. I kneel in front of you and bury my face in your sex. I nibble on your lips and flatten my tongue, rubbing it along your clit from side to side. I bring you to climax. Before you recover, I put myself back in your mouth. You attempt to resist, but I only want you to know how good you taste. We stumble toward the bed, and I lay you on your back. I enter you and fuck you so deeply, you’d swear I was trying to part you in half. Your nails are digging deep into my back, your face buried in my chest. With each thrust, I bring you closer to the edge of the bed. Your head and upper body are draped over the edge, and I watch your tits bounce with each thrust. You struggle to brace yourself and I grab the tops of your thighs and penetrate you deeper. You feel every kick of my orgasm. I pull you back onto the bed and lay on top of you, remaining inside of you. You are not allowed to clean up. I stay inside you until I start to soften. When I pull out, I watch our passion trickle out of you. I watch your body rise and fall with each exacerbated breath. Exhaustion will claim us both shortly and this is the last vision I want to have before it does.
This does not have to be a fantasy. This is not a passage from a book. Don’t allow me to fuck your women better than you do…
Fuck Fifty Shades of Grey…